I feel terribly guilty. Yesterday morning, by train, I watched my kitten in the cage in front of me who looked around with curiosity: "Where are we going?" seemed to ask. We arrived and there were vetrinario by a dog who was shaking like a leaf, and another cat red devil. As I watched them I wondered what could pass for my cat's head in that situation.
smelled of medicines and the place was rather antiseptic. The only note of color were a couple of books about dogs and cats. Even the paintings on the walls were black and white. He will realize it? cats see colors? or just the contrast?
For two minutes I was alone with him in the waiting room. I put the cage on his knees and I approached her face to his Musina. I stroked the nose and paws and told him to do good and I'd come back soon and get it.
Then came our turn, we came in and within two minutes I was out alone, without too many pleasantries. Basically it is a interventino really easy, I thought to myself. But as I walked home the guilt started to pervade. Got home I cleaned the bowl and placemat, I changed the bedding and clean the floor. I find that all good back home. But this did not make me feel better. I spent the day wondering "will have it already done?" as if deep down I hoped to be still in time to stop everything and take it back as it is. A cat healthy, happy, and full capacity of his instincts. I kept telling myself it's for his own good. In this way he will not suffer being locked up at home, will not want to run away, will not end under a car ... But that, apart from our love, what's left? Perhaps without castrate living outdoors, even in a big city like this would have been happier. He lived less likely, but what counts for an animal? What you can make it really counts? Make him a thing is not grim violence against a defenseless being? is not simply selfishness? Of course, if I had not got in the house at this time could already be dead. Could andargli worse, but maybe even better. I feel an incredible Magone, a heaviness that hurts.
Why do I feel this way? With the other had been different, I lived as a routine, something that was done and nothing more. No guilt. At the bottom is only a cat. A cat in a week or two will have already forgotten about it and will never know What has been lost, what would live and what emotions he could try. What emotions felt by cats? I have hated between yesterday and today?
When we went to take it back was still groggy from anesthesia, but his eyes ball as if he had drank a jug of coffee. During the ride in the car emits faint mews. I was crying my heart.
got home probably hoped to return immediately to normal, but there vetrinario advised to leave it in the cage a little more 'for pass anesthesia completely. Attached to squirm to get out and meowing a lot ... but never as strong .. as if you can not do.
kept thinking that the day before jumping in around, playing with the ball ... and now it was there. I had ordered to be sick. I wondered who was the beast among us. After a while 'is quieted. With the claws protruding from the cage. Resigned.
We liberated, finally and quietly went around. The we put the water bowl. And 'course towards the bowl meowing, probably hoped to food. Mamma mia, but it is possible that such a thing to give all this trouble? Or become hypersensitive overnight?
We went to bed and I had horrible dreams that I do not remember at all.
At 6 and a half woke me up meowing. I gave them the soup, which was devoured in 2 minutes, and I went back to bed.
Shortly after I reached and is nestled on my pillow, with his head in my hair, as usually done. Finally, it was purring. I will be forgiven? Or will not even really understand what happened? Maybe I am not associated with pain that he experienced. Maybe not even tried a lot of pain. I do not know. But surely no longer be as before. And it is my fault. I have taken something that belonged in law and that nothing can give him. I betrayed her trust.
smelled of medicines and the place was rather antiseptic. The only note of color were a couple of books about dogs and cats. Even the paintings on the walls were black and white. He will realize it? cats see colors? or just the contrast?
For two minutes I was alone with him in the waiting room. I put the cage on his knees and I approached her face to his Musina. I stroked the nose and paws and told him to do good and I'd come back soon and get it.
Then came our turn, we came in and within two minutes I was out alone, without too many pleasantries. Basically it is a interventino really easy, I thought to myself. But as I walked home the guilt started to pervade. Got home I cleaned the bowl and placemat, I changed the bedding and clean the floor. I find that all good back home. But this did not make me feel better. I spent the day wondering "will have it already done?" as if deep down I hoped to be still in time to stop everything and take it back as it is. A cat healthy, happy, and full capacity of his instincts. I kept telling myself it's for his own good. In this way he will not suffer being locked up at home, will not want to run away, will not end under a car ... But that, apart from our love, what's left? Perhaps without castrate living outdoors, even in a big city like this would have been happier. He lived less likely, but what counts for an animal? What you can make it really counts? Make him a thing is not grim violence against a defenseless being? is not simply selfishness? Of course, if I had not got in the house at this time could already be dead. Could andargli worse, but maybe even better. I feel an incredible Magone, a heaviness that hurts.
Why do I feel this way? With the other had been different, I lived as a routine, something that was done and nothing more. No guilt. At the bottom is only a cat. A cat in a week or two will have already forgotten about it and will never know What has been lost, what would live and what emotions he could try. What emotions felt by cats? I have hated between yesterday and today?
When we went to take it back was still groggy from anesthesia, but his eyes ball as if he had drank a jug of coffee. During the ride in the car emits faint mews. I was crying my heart.
got home probably hoped to return immediately to normal, but there vetrinario advised to leave it in the cage a little more 'for pass anesthesia completely. Attached to squirm to get out and meowing a lot ... but never as strong .. as if you can not do.
kept thinking that the day before jumping in around, playing with the ball ... and now it was there. I had ordered to be sick. I wondered who was the beast among us. After a while 'is quieted. With the claws protruding from the cage. Resigned.
We liberated, finally and quietly went around. The we put the water bowl. And 'course towards the bowl meowing, probably hoped to food. Mamma mia, but it is possible that such a thing to give all this trouble? Or become hypersensitive overnight?
We went to bed and I had horrible dreams that I do not remember at all.
At 6 and a half woke me up meowing. I gave them the soup, which was devoured in 2 minutes, and I went back to bed.
Shortly after I reached and is nestled on my pillow, with his head in my hair, as usually done. Finally, it was purring. I will be forgiven? Or will not even really understand what happened? Maybe I am not associated with pain that he experienced. Maybe not even tried a lot of pain. I do not know. But surely no longer be as before. And it is my fault. I have taken something that belonged in law and that nothing can give him. I betrayed her trust.